Here is the next trailer:
Eat Your Art Out,
The Fine Art Diner
|The Democrats, Progressives, Left and liberals would tell us that these two men--by virtue of their racial identities from birth--hate each other and that the white guy (Zac Effron, right) is oppressing the Oceanic-black man on the left (Dwayne Johnson). In a way, we see Mitch Buchanan (Johnson) oppressing Brody (Effron): Brody wants on the Baywatch team, and Mitch won't let him. It's only through a reversed "affirmative action" that Brody gets to be a lifeguard (the head of Baywatch telling Mitch that Brody would be good PR because he has two gold medals; companies and universities use affirmative action as "good PR" which is why nothing works right nowadays and people have become so lazy). In a capitalist sense, we can see a more hopeful picture: Baywatch is Brody's second chance (the way Dom and his team get a "second chance" in the Fast and Furious franchise, or Batman gets a second chance to make up to dead Superman in Justice League, so second chances are good). In this particular scene pictured above, I have no idea what is going on, however, Mitch--because he is not wearing a shirt--"exposes" himself to the events taking place (that's what nudity symbolizes, "exposure") whereas Brody, wearing the blue shirt, is keeping himself protected (not naked and exposed) because past experience has taught him the price to be paid for participating in this kind of event (whatever it is taking place in this scene); why? We know that blue, the color of Brody's shirt, symbolizes sadness and wisdom (don't forget that Brody refers to his "balls" as "wise" even though they sound like three-year-old girls) and we know that Brody needs a job as a lifeguard because, even though he won two Olympic gold medals, something has happened and he's officially "disgraced" (more on this below). Whatever happened to cause Brody's fall from favor, he's taking precautions so it doesn't happen again (that doesn't mean he's taking the right precautions, or going about it in the right way, but he's trying). Note, also, how he holds onto his flotation device: that would be a "personal statement," in that Brody feels he needs the "flotation" for himself during this situation to help him get through it because he's afraid of drowning in whatever is taking place. Mitch, on the other hand, literally, is wearing that huge wristwatch, and that means he has a sense of history, of what the Baywatch brand really "is" and "means" and how he fits into it and what is expected of him to maintain and uphold that.|
We still don't give a fuck
|We should probably pay attention for a lot of other films to be referenced; why? Because Baywatch is going to want to link itself up in the public forum of cinematic discourse with films that have said the same things it's wanting to say: for example, The Kingsman: Secret Service. As Eggsy is trying to save the world from Valentine's explosion, Princess Tilde of Sweden offers herself for anal sex with Eggsy and he takes her up on it in exchange for saving her; Mitch, on the other hand, when the girl in the image above offers herself to him, shrugs it off, and--when he tosses her into the water away from the flaming ship--we see her bikini bottom is yellow; why? Yellow is the color of gold, which means it's the color of dignity, and because they are the bottoms covering her genitals, which she just offered to Mitch, we can deduce that Mitch has more respect for her sexual dignity than she does. In the image below, we can see the jump away from the flames possibly referencing that awesome film, Deepwater Horizon (Mark Wahlberg, John Malkovitch); why? I have no idea, but we do know that Deepwater Horizon was poorly managed, which led to the explosion, and it's possible the Baywatch division is being poorly managed as well. So, look for references being made to other films, because I'm sure it's going to be loaded.|
|Sure, it's probably really cheesy to have beautiful, healthy people running along a beach, for now reason; except there is a reason, and actually, there are two reasons. First, it's a reference to that classical Chariots Of Fire, the film following young men as they train for the Olympics and push themselves as to what they can accomplish when they put their minds--and bodies--to the job at hand. Baywatch wants us to be thinking about that as we watch the film, which is why it's reminding us of this famous scene. Secondly, which would you prefer to have: a world where people look like the five healthy, beautiful men and women from left to right, or a world where everyone looks like Ronnie (at the far right end, trying to keep up)? We discussed this with Zoolander 2, where someone was killing "the world's most beautiful people" and how it's like wealth redistribution: we think it would be nice not to have the most beautiful people in the world reminding us that we are not the most beautiful people, that they are instead, but it wouldn't take long before everyone in the world looked like Ronnie and we would be without the beautiful, healthy people we see in this image, that hating someone for the way they look is just as bad as hating someone for the wealth they have that we don't. But we also know that in this scene, Brody (Effron) trips and falls; why? Because he's human, too. Just like us, they have their faults and shortcomings, and they are going to get old, and they will age just like us, so we should be thankful that the standards they set for health and beauty "trickle down to" us, and we take some effort to take care of ourselves because of the standard we are fortunate enough to have in them, regardless of how out of each it is for most of us.|
|"You should look at my face instead of my boobs," Summer (Daddario) tells Brody, "But your boobs are so close to your face," and, actually, he's right. What is the first thing we notice about another person? Whether they are male, female, male and trying to look like a female, or female and trying to pass for a male; our sexual identity (her boobs) is an inherent part of our identity (the face) and Summer telling Brody he should only look at her face while she's wearing only a swim top accentuating her breasts, isn't Brody's fault, it's her fault, and that's exactly what feminists want, because it puts them in a position, just like Summer, of making heterosexual men look bad, when in fact, it's women like Summer who are intentionally tempting men with their immodest dressing.|
In the bottom image, we understand the "castration effect" spoken of below (after the next trailer): men with no balls don't stand up and protect anything or question anything, as we see with Brody; this is exactly the kind of men the liberals want in the world, not the Mitch Buchanans who will question everything and protect what they love at all costs. Now, if you think I'm making too much of this, I understand, but please consider that the villain, Victoria Leeds, is a drug dealer; what do drugs do? They alter reality, and what is the left trying to do? Alter reality. The left peddles drugs, so men will castrate themselves, women will be whores and we can all be miserable with just a few corrupt people ruling over us. What stops the altering of reality? Responsibility and sacrifice. When we take responsibility for what we have done, when we make sacrifices for that which we love, we are defying the left and their cheap tricks.
|The head of Baywatch asks Mitch, "How many gold medals do you have?" and Mitch doesn't have any, but that doesn't mean that Brody is qualified to be a lifeguard and we see that even in the trailers. On the other hand, we can see Mitch being too obsessive, and not allowing for a expansion of skills and talents.|
In the bottom image, the black cop has just used the phrase, "You people," and Brody reacts and Mitch tells him, "Oh, you can't say that. You're just tan." You might remember a similar scene in Zootopia, when Judy Hopps, a bunny, is told by Chester Cheetah that she's such a cute bunny, and Judy tells him that another bunny can call a bunny cute, but another animal can't say that; why not? Censorship of the freedom of speech and the ridiculous elevation of emotions and sensitivity; we have all experienced it, so I don't need to go into it.